FIND THE RIGHT PARTNER REGARDLESS OF LOOKS
Books for sale at Amazon Kindle Store, https://roselynvandyksatamazon.wordpress, https://amazon.com/author/roselynvandyk
Excerpted from the books of Roselyn Van Dyk titles: The Fulfillment of Marriage, There Are Ten Love Languages, and The Power of Love. There are all available in Amazon.com Kindle store.
The reason that I am inspire to publish these topics about marriage because it indicated in Word Press graph that is still number one ratings. I am pleased with the results. Why you stumble of reading this blogs! I pray that you need it. I wrote this in my marriage relationship journey regardless of odds and ends. If it works for me it will work for you.
#Reviews and ratings. Readers, your views and feedback are very valuable for me. I invite your views and thoughts for leaving reviews and rating at the platform of Amazon.com Kindle store when you buy. Your insights not only inspire me but also offer hope and encouragement for others. Thank you very much for your support.
On the other hand, I mentioned being gregarious and friendly to people. Still, I have a weakness, called tiny or short “potot” in our Visayan dialect, wounded my spirit as a child. Until now, being rude and petite has not been easy to handle. I also mentioned my half-sister, who has mental problems and other name-calling, like crazy family. This is also part of the problem of finding my dream boy in our area. It’s simple things that become a stigma, but I seemed to be problematic. However, when I went for further study, I didn’t live there long; I studied, searched for jobs, and worked in other cities for a change. You think you forget them, and I was very conscious about my height but brave enough to fight with the boys who belittled the little boys. My mother is a second-grade teacher, so every time I encountered trouble due to my big mouth, I got mad when they teased me and called me short. I hated to be short. It’s not an issue to others, but I consider it an insult, giving me insecurity or a chip on the shoulder. So, even if they were bigger than me, I fought and brawled with the boys in the class. I wouldn’t say I liked it. I hated being short.
But I seemed to attract men easily for some reason. That’s why when you read this book. There are so many stories that I include about how I encountered men who were either married, single, weird, obsessed, crazy love, vices, and many various types that I called “NOT MY TYPE.”
I got into a fight with young boys in my early life. How about if they’re my life partner? Where can I find them? It is not in this place. He has to be somewhere!
There is always something that somebody dislikes about themselves. For example, maybe this exceptionally tall person wishes they were shorter. The skinny person wishes they were slimmer.
It lingered for years, even when I was already in my adult life. Competing with other applicants is so tricky when you apply for a job. Even in the Philippines, you must be 5’2 in height as a requirement for job applicants. I got away from it because I graduated from the standard school in our country and represented myself in the interview and examination process for the job. But I have to struggle and fight to get a job like the others, whatever shortcomings they have. Sometimes, when somebody is looking at me, my goodness, even now, I always take offense and jump to the wrong conclusion and say, ‘probably they look at me because I am short.” I have a feeling of self-pity.
This factor also became my insecurity in finding a suitable man, especially finding a husband who is Caucasian and an ordinary man of my race. Looking for a husband might be a hindrance because of my physical appearance, small and short.
Please understand me; my issues may not be significant for others. There is always room for us to improve ourselves and room to accept the way we are. But I am talking about when you are constantly putting yourself down. It created low esteem, and I always seemed to compare myself to someone else or wish I were someone else. If I continue to do this, I will never enjoy the life God plans for me to want.
I don’t know about you and what you went through or problems physically, features of your body, financial, mental, emotional, victim of abuse, and other issues in your life. We will never experience high success if we constantly look down on ourselves. We have to remember that God approves of you and me.
In 1 Corinthians 15:10, “But the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect.”NIV.
I am what I am, and by the grace of God, you are what you are. I have been so concerned about myself in the past few years, but we must be grateful for who we are, including you. However, if every one of us had the same personality, same ideas, same ideals, and same opinions, the world would be dull. That is the reason God made us unique. We’re special to God. There is something about you that no one else can replicate and duplicate. That’s why they always use the thumb for identity; everyone has a different thumb mark.
Why do I mention this? Once, I discovered how God sees me. I begin to see myself the way God sees me, no matter what anybody else says, and have been told my self-esteem will rise from the Word of God all my life.
You can also change how you feel about yourself if you spend more time looking in the mirror of God’s Word instead of in your glass mirror. I know you don’t like what you can see in your glass mirror, but if you look in the mirror of God’s Word, you will be changed into that same image. For all these years, I have spent enough time in the Word of God; what it says will become more real than what I see in the natural. For those who read this book, you also become what the Word says who you are and see your actual image. We’ll be transformed into the image that God planned for us.
My late sister was also a victim of bullying and name-calling. We’re the same because she’s also short, and our family history. When I came to know her while she was still alive, I could see the symptoms and signs of her insecurity, and she told me about her bad experiences. It was so very damaging that it affected her personality and character.
We made a pact as an agreement, some finding a way out that our children would not become our life’s experiences and may stop this damaging bondage in our children’s lives. We must break this cycle in our family, including other issues of the generational curses done by ancestors as our lineage and heritage. In those days, we never heard about the Word of God, even though we’re so-called Christians. We know the Bible. Before my sister passed away, she became a born-again and saved her soul, too. We found the resources through the guidance of the Holy Spirit of those ministries we partnered with.
How did we meet our spouses? In the 1970s, 1980’s pen pals with foreigners (men from other countries looking for romantic relationships through correspondence) were trendy. Now, there are so many social media and agencies where you can find your mates, either for the reason of having friends that lead to love and marriage in this modern time.
He gave us Caucasian Australian husbands; our children have grown up. My sister has two daughters, and they’re very tall; the eldest, my two nieces, are taller; they’re both sensible, educated, have professions, and have pleasant character and pleasing personality. The younger one, Petrie, is much taller than I expected. She got that attribute from her tall father (6-footer), who was artistic and spiritual. Both of them are well-disciplined and pleasant in character and personality.
My daughter is also tall because her father is tall. They all look Eurasian; not only are they pleasing in appearance, but they all have excellent and compassionate hearts. She finished their Bachelor of Veterinary Science degree and has a certificate as a surgeon for big and small animals; her specialty is Equine for Horses. It’s not only that she likes horses, which she was intended to be, but I know that God placed that in her heart; she is a very highly sport-minded person and achiever with accomplishments both in the schools, university, and community—even, receiving many awards and trophies either from the University of Queensland or from Gymkhana -horse riding events with games and contests. She’s a blessing to us. She is very adventuresome and travels a lot worldwide. She likes skiing, hand gliding, scuba diving, parachuting, and many more with her mate. Here I am, the mother, who is also very concerned for her safety. That’s when I learned how to pray intensely with all the worries, anxiety, and fear of what would happen to her. However, it’s not that she is a bad daughter, not at all. She’s a lovely and obedient child.
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