WHAT IS LOVE-GRACED BASED RELATIONSHIP
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A marriage is for two people only and exclusively. Outside of including God in your relationship, any other third party breaks the marriage bond. There are drugs, alcohol, promiscuity, pornography, an affair, or any other promoter of destructive behavior that will always be a third party in any married life. It will be an intruder in your relationship. If you are particularly vulnerable because you may be struggling with your marriage, I would suggest being cautious about sharing your problems, even if you have known the person (man or woman) for a long time, as a friend. Seductive women who want to entice you or charming talking men who want to seduce you into extramarital marriage. Even your closest relatives, co-workers, and other temptations may wreck your marriage. It intrudes into your relationship together.
It’s regrettable. When you see the victims, the children are suffering from this deplorable destructive behavior by saying, “They will go over it.” Don’t you think so? Crying during the night, and many areas that will affect their lives, unhappiness, and many damaging emotional disorders. They will never go over it unless they seek God and become born-again believers to heal their souls. Deep down, the soulish areas of their soul get hurt. Perhaps a Psychologist, Physiotherapist, or Guidance counselor can help. I suggest consulting with the Guidance and Counselor or any mental health professional who can help, but it is limited. However, it remains unclear whether they will review it. But it’s better than nothing. They get hurt in their soul deep down.
There are numerous consequences, including a lifetime of feeling guilty. How about the culprit? The children will cause them to have depression and other destructive behaviors. I heard that a lot and saw it myself. They suffer a lot even in their adulthood. How about the other members of a family? You feel sorry for the sufferings that cause them to hate, feel lonely, and be deprived.
However, there is a price to pay for everything we do: temptation, destructive behavior, and attitude. It is simply behavior that constantly announces our spouse to desperation. There is also a reward for every attempt to do the right thing. God will reward each according to his works. (Matthew 16:27).
Destructive behavior or simply behavior that constantly annoys your spouse to the point of desperation is not good, and there will always be severe consequences for it in your marriage and personal life. But every attempt you make to discover and see that behavior in yourself and to do what is right to rid yourself of it will bring a reward.
Countless couples are now divorced or separated because of a weak moment in their lives; one of them resorted to some destructive behavior that they eventually couldn’t get free of. However, it becomes their downfall. You may not have a single bad habit, and neither does your spouse, but for those believers or even non-believers, you pray for this issue. Pray that God will protect your marriage from destructive behavior in either of you.
Even when you think you’ll get over it, you want to go as far away as possible. Your conscience is following you. We can have an annoying habit that drives our spouse crazy, and we must be strong enough to recognize it. I am not trying to lecture here, for I am not a Marriage Guidance Counselor. It’s my own opinion because it can happen to anyone. I suggest seeing a Marriage Counselor for both parties, especially if it is pointed out to us precisely enough or not enough times in our rage and anger.
Suppose we see something like that in our spouse. In that case, we can pray about that before we speak and ask God to give him (her) ears to hear and the ability to get free of whatever annoying habit we feel could destroy our marriage. Pray don’t nag. Nagging doesn’t work. In my case, in the past, I was a complaining wife; in fact, I almost got everything materially. We live frugally, but we have a house and property. When I became a born-again believer, I was transformed and changed because of the Word of God, praying, and other factors to sort out the problem. Was it me? Or is he difficult, as I heard from others? As I understand later, I think most of those comments are frustrations about his situation and how to adjust, understand, and adapt to the problem; that’s what I did. It’s more productive and considerate to address comments from outside sources.
God does not create us to destroy ourselves. We are built to present our lives. We have a survival instinct in us. We don’t willingly let ourselves put a gun to our head, jump off a bridge, commit suicide, let ourselves drown, or jump off a building. We do those things unless we are not in our right mind or under the influence of something other than God. It is crucial to show our children how we react to our spouse as an example, so they learn how to respect one another.
Excerpted from the books of Roselyn Van Dyk +The Fulfillment of Marriage and other related books available in Amazon.com Kindle store. “Loved my books? Please leave a detailed review on Amazon, like the insights on my blog. Share what you loved about the story, characters, or themes. Search Roselyn Van Dyk on Amazon Kindle Store. Thanks! #BookReviews”
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